The downside of being a frequent traveler

What do you mean there are downsides to traveling?

It does sound a little weird, even to me. But I've realized recently that being a frequent flyer comes with some unexpected twists that I must say I'm not a huge fan of.

First: it's easy to sound like a huge asshole.

Last night, one of my friends was telling me about all of the different states she wants to visit (Oregon, Colorado, Vermont, etc.) and my first reaction was "oh I love [insert state here], it's so beautiful!" I meant it in the most genuine way, trying to encourage her to visit, and telling her that it's totally worth it. Turns out it sounded like I was bragging. I got a response like "of course you've been there" in a sarcastic tone.

It happens to me way too often. I only mean to share experiences, and it's not like I'm trying to brag. I don't walk up to people saying "Hey, guess what! I've been to 35 states and a bunch of countries! I'm so cool!" but sometimes people react as if I did do that. But I don't want to keep my experiences to myself either. I make it a huge point in my life to travel. I save money to make semi-regular trips, and plan them out (or take random trips to Europe) both ways work pretty well for me, so why shouldn't I share it? This is one downside I'm not sure I'll ever be able to resolve, to be honest.

Second: once you start, you can't stop.

Isn't that the story with everything?

Every time I get back from one trip, I'm ready to start planning the next. I just can't get enough. I'm not the type of person to only go to a city once, either. I like to take a couple of trips, just to make sure I see everything.

And let's not pretend this isn't at least slightly a downside. Traveling is expensive. Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with spending half of my (very small) salary on traveling. In fact, I wouldn't want to spend it on anything else. However, it doesn't leave much room for saving for things like a house or a car, at least not any time soon.

Are there any downsides to traveling I've missed? Let me know!

Bucket lists - good or bad?

Do people even keep bucket lists anymore?

Most of the people I've talked to don't keep a "real" bucket list. A lot of my friends will pin things that could qualify as bucket list items; most people have things they absolutely want to do in their lives, but do they keep lists?

When I was younger I was never really sure what a bucket list was, or why I would want one. Why would I keep a piece of paper with me my entire life? Now, I know that it doesn't necessarily have to be a physical piece of paper, or even really written down. However, I find that keeping the traditional idea of a bucket list alive is so charming, and incidentally a huge part of my life.

Whenever I'm feeling uninspired, I pull out my bucket list.

Yes, I do keep a very literal bucket list. I made it when I was in high school, and have continued to add things to it as I come up with them. I've even been able to cross some things off!

I wrote my bucket list on a piece of paper from my favorite notebook (I have this weird, sentimental attachment to it, I only write *very* important things in it). I used a "pretty" pen and used my very best handwriting. It started as a list of things I wanted to do during my gap year - which I never actually took, but that's a story for another time. It's since evolved to include more life experiences than simply places to visit.

For me, this list represents my innocence. It represents the dreams I've had since before real life hit. Things that are true desires, that had nothing to do with showing off to my friends on social media or to add to my resume. They're raw dreams that can't ever be tainted. And they're forever written on this piece of paper I guard with my life (not really, but it is stuck in my journal, so it's kind of the same thing).

Some people never had that innocence, they never dared to dream big, so maybe that's why they don't keep a bucket list of their own. Others may fear never achieving all of the things their list, so they never dare to write it down. In that sense, I can understand the fear. Some people can't give themselves the room to dream big, or to be disappointed, and to each his own. If I hadn't had that bucket list I made so long ago, though, my dreams would have stopped ages ago. I probably wouldn't have made it as far as I have in life. For that, I must thank high-school me, and my bucket list.

Choosing a life path

I like to use "life path" and "career" interchangeably. In my mind, your career is your life, and your career dictates your lifestyle (and your lifestyle dictates your career, for that matter). However, life paths can lead you to many different careers, but they'll *probably* all be connected in one way or another.

So I still haven't finished college, but I'd like to think I've got the right idea on choosing a path. I've changed my mind so many times up until this point, I've at least got the internal debate part down. I don't know exactly where I'll end up, but I have come to realize that there doesn't have to be one single choice that will dictate your entire life.

The school I go to (NYU Stern) is a business school, which I had to choose before I even applied to college. So my major (business) has been pretty much set in stone since Dec. 31st 2013; however, I do get to choose a "concentration" and minors, which has given me a whole lot of internal debating to do. At first, I was 100% interested in finance, then I moved on to marketing, now I'm more interested in entrepreneurship and management.

The real kicker is: I've decided that my choice in concentration really doesn't matter for me. Sure, if I wanted to work for Goldman Sachs (I used to, but that's not really my thing anymore), I should probably follow the clearly outlined path for finance. But I don't want to live life according to a very specified plan.

I want to live a life I can always be happy with. 

That means I'm probably going to switch jobs 20 times, all of them being in completely different industries. I'll probably get bored at the first few, then too stressed by a few more, until I find the perfect one. But for now, I'm setting myself up for those changes that will make me happy.

I'm learning a little bit about all different types of business, and even things outside of business, so I can do whatever my heart desires when I "grow up." I want to spend some time building my own company (if I can ever come up with an idea, that is). I might want to go to law school (who knows!), or maybe I'll move to an island and scoop ice cream for a year or so (actually a dream of mine). But for now, my life path is to have an ever-evolving path. It's no yellow brick road to Oz or anything, but it is (hopefully) perfect for me.

A book that totally changed my perspective

Recently, I went through a couple of months where I had almost no motivation. You can read a little more about that here. But then I read a great, inspirational book that really helped me dig myself out of the slump I was in.

That book was You are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life, by Jen Sincero. Now, normally I'm not the type of person to pick up a self-help book. Or even read a self-help article online. But this one was different.

When I first started reading it, I was little skeptical, but she writes in the first few pages that for this book to work, you have to keep an open mind. And it's true, you do. Sincero writes in such a genuine way that it's hard to feel bad about yourself for reading it. It's like a virtual ass-kicking that you just need sometimes.

Within the book it goes over things like money and weight loss, but what I really needed was just to hear that I can do it. There was no specific "it" that I couldn't do or needed to do; I just really needed some pushing. I went through the book, did the activities instructed, and it really changed me.

Now, I can't say I do everything I was instructed to continue doing, like writing out mantras and things, but I do think about the advice in the book almost every day. Her basic idea is that you have to live the life you want to live. You can't wallow in your lack of money and expect money to come flying at you. And that really spoke to me. I can't sit around thinking about how unmotivated I am and expect motivation to magically appear. So since I finished reading it, I've thought about the advice in the book. I've been taking steps to keep my motivation and ambition, working to keep myself ready for whatever comes next for me, and I must say, it's been work but it's also been well worth it.

5 Reasons you should schedule alone time while traveling

It's no secret that I love traveling with people. I've gone with family, friends, and even school trips across the world. Even with all of this variety, the #1 thing I've learned about planning trips is to plan for alone time.

If you're in a big group, maybe that alone time is just time in a smaller group, or maybe it truly is alone. In any form, getting away from the whole group for a while can be insanely helpful, and possibly the thing that keeps you from losing your mind. So here's why you should do it:

1.  No one can handle socializing constantly for days on end.
   Unless you can, then that's cool. But most of us need a little time to destress from the constant discussion of what you're seeing & how wonderful the trip is (or how unpleasant it is, in which case you definitely need a break).
2. Exploring alone helps you grow.
   I know it sounds cheesy, but sometimes it's just better to go through a thousand-year-old cathedral alone and absorb the beauty and sentiment without having to discuss it with others. 
3. It's empowering.
   Once you realize you can take on the world alone (or at least a piece of it), you realize you can do anything. The first time I went off on my own in a foreign city I was scared to death, but when I understood how good it felt to do it all alone I felt on top of the world.
4. You're traveling to feed your own wanderlust, not everyone else's.
   Unless you're only on the trip because someone dragged you along, then maybe you are traveling for them. Generally, though, you're there to help yourself. To be immersed in culture, to see the world. Don't settle for less than what you want. Feed your appetite. Don't just do enough to tide you over until next time, traveling isn't like a 3pm snack; it's the whole meal. 
5. It's your trip, make it what you want it.
   Yes, compromise is a great thing, but sometimes you just have to do what you want to do. If you're in Paris and you're the only one who wants to see the Catacombs, then go see them! It's not every day you get to see things like that, don't miss them.

Why I'm not scared of my student loans

I currently have $140,000 in student loans and I'm only half way through my undergrad degree.

By the time I graduate from NYU I will be over $280,000 in debt, and that's not even including all of interest that I'll be racking up. Chances are, by the time I finish paying off all of my debt it will be over $300,000 worth. For 4 years of school. That's assuming that I don't go to grad school or anything, but I do plan to go to grad school.

Everyone reading this is probably thinking that I'm insane.

Honestly, I probably am. It's going to take me years to pay off the debt I've accumulated. But honestly, I think it's all worth it. There are a lot of people that make more sound financial decisions about college. They choose to go to a less expensive school or find a way to finance through scholarships and grants. Unfortunately, based on my family's salary, I didn't qualify for much financial aid. (Like, I get a $5,500 subsidized loan, which is basically only saving me a thousand dollars or so). I got a few scholarships, but none of them were sponsored by NYU. But I'm not here to complain about the education system or NYU's lack of financial aid.

What I am here to talk about is why I'm not afraid of having this massive amount of debt as a 20 year old. 

I believe that to make something of yourself you need to take risks. You need to believe in yourself. I had to take the leap for myself. I couldn't let my dreams go because I was scared of having a lot of loans to pay back. I'm truly thankful for every moment I've had at NYU so far, and will continue to be thankful for the rest of my life.

I wouldn't be where I am now if I had made a more "rational" decision. 

I wouldn't have my ambition anymore, and I sure as hell wouldn't have the connections I have so early in my career. 

This isn't to say that if you go to a different school you're not as good as those who go to private schools. Hell, there are probably a lot of people at cheaper schools who will do greater things than I ever will, and who have a ton more passion and perseverance than I do. But for me, if I had settled for anything less I would have given up on all of my dreams. I would've settled for being mediocre and probably wouldn't get very far in life. 

I can't rationally justify the massive debt I'll be paying back for, like, forever, nor can I say that I'm the best at making financial decisions - you all know I go on random trips to Europe more often than the average person. But I can say that it was the best decision I could have made for me. I'll face the consequences head-on and be ready to make some tough financial decisions in the future as well. But everything in life comes with trade-offs, and I'm glad I made the decision I did.

Staying motivated takes work

Like, a lot of work.

This past semester I went through some ups and downs. And by some a mean tons of ups and even more downs. For a while I was convinced I was finally going to start a company, and a few days later I thought I'd never actually get to point in my life where I'd have the guts and willingness to actually start one. For a while I thought I might get a 4.0 for the semester (HA!), then I was convinced I'd be lucky to get just one A.

I guess what I'm saying is that my semester was very all over the place.

Sure, it's normal to go through different phases in life, but mine were incredibly dramatic. I did do a lot of soul-searching during the semester, that I'm still doing into the summer. I have no idea where my life will take me, but I know that I'll never give up on being successful.

What I've learned over the past few months, and what I'm still learning, is that sometimes you just have to take a step back from everything and reevaluate where you are in life. I realized I'm not the same person I was just a year ago, and that I'm drastically different from the person I was two years ago. While I believe that change is good, and that we should all grow as people, you should never lose your passions, you should never lose who you are fundamentally.

I had a moment where I realized that I had to change my life, that I had to get back to who I was before, or at least become closer to myself. I wouldn't call it rock bottom or anything, but it was definitely a low. I needed that low, I needed something to push me back on track. Now, I'm not completely back on track, but I'm a hell of a lot closer than I was. I'm starting to regain my passions, to get the drive I need to study (even though it's currently summer), to delve into business ideas, to read all the books on my list, and to plan the trips I've so desperately wanted to take.

I'm not sure where I started to get off track, or what kept pushing me further and further away from myself, but I'm glad it did. It sucked at the time, but I'm growing to appreciate who I am much more because of it.

If you ever find yourself off track don't be afraid to take a step back and really look at your life. I'll write a little more on how I'm working to get back to my 'normal' motivated self later this week.